Passive Parents

I am doing a little work on VBS today from Panera!  I got myself all set-up and was ready to work and then a family came and sat beside me.  The mom, dad, two kids and the grandmother.  I love to people watch anyway, so I finished my cinnamon crunch bagel (which is heaven in bagel form) and watched away.  In secret of course.

I was completely blown away by the passive nature of each of the adults at the table! It seemed that every decision that needed to made while they ate their breakfast was completely made by the children. One child said that she didn't 'like' the fork that he was using, so the dad quickly said that he would give her a new fork. The fork wasn't dirty, it hadn't fallen on the floor, the child simply just didn't like it. The same child didn't want to sit in a certain seat, so the mom allowed her to switch seats, not one time, but three different times.  The little boy didn't 'want' what he was given to eat (which didn't look good anyway, so I don't blame him), but the grandmother quickly got him a cookie and let him eat it.
All of these things seem like they are not a big deal in and of themselves, but it was completely obvious by the tone of the parents/grandparent voices that these children were allowed to make whatever choice they wanted and the adults would be at their beckon call.

IT WAS SO SAD TO WATCH.

I think that parents are so afraid of their children! When you allow a child to make every decision and you are okay with all of those decisions and go along with them, you have taught your child nothing.  All they will learn from any of those experiences is that they are in charge and that you, the parent, have no authority over them.

Sitting here at Panera is just a reminder of what I see all the time with parents.  A child doesn't want to go to their class, so the parents don't make them.  A child doesn't want to go to a store, so the parents don't go.  A child doesn't want to clean up their toys, so they don't have to.  The list could go on and on.

I think that it is extremely important to allow a child to have some independence, but don't confuse independence and choice with the authority that you have been given by God.  God has given you the responsibility to raise your child.  Not for your child to raise themselves.
Parents need to stop trying to be best friends with their children, and start being parents to their children.

Just my thoughts!  What do you think?